What to Say to Someone in Rehab
If you have a friend or family member who is beginning the journey of addiction recovery, you might be wondering what to say to someone in rehab.
It isn’t uncommon to question what the best things are to say to someone when they are getting help for addiction, as we don’t want to offend, hurt, or trigger our loved ones during their addiction treatment program.
Since this is a sensitive and challenging time in a person’s life, it’s important to approach conversations with reassuring statements, kindness, and compassion. Participating in a Family Rehab and Support Program can also help you better understand how to communicate effectively.
Now, let’s explore some meaningful conversation starters and quotes to help you speak with a loved one in rehab.
What Is Rehab and Why Is Addiction Treatment So Important?
Rehabilitation, also known as rehab, is a structured program that helps individuals overcome addiction and regain control of their lives by combining medical care, support systems, and evidence-based addiction therapy to treat both the physical and psychological aspects of addiction.
Entering rehab can feel overwhelming, as it involves confronting withdrawal, engaging in self-reflection, and committing to personal growth. However, entering an addiction treatment program is essential for breaking the cycle of substance use and beginning the recovery journey, an important part of the process for many struggling with the types of Addiction We Treat.
The Impact of the Right Words in Recovery
Words have the power to heal, uplift, inspire, and encourage. When in rehab, individuals often face feelings of self-doubt, shame, fear of failure, and that they’ve hit rock bottom. Words of encouragement from loved ones can provide much-needed confidence and reassurance, acting as a buffer against these negative feelings.
Addiction research experts have shown that positive reinforcement improves self-esteem and enhances motivation during recovery. Encouraging words and simple affirmations like “You’re doing great” or “I’m here for you” can make a significant difference during their treatment process.
Encouraging Words for Someone in Rehab
Are you wondering what to say to someone in recovery?
Our luxury rehab asked 250 clients recovering from drug and alcohol addiction what the most powerful things a friend or loved one could say to offer support while they were in our addiction treatment center. Some of the most common answers and themes were:
- “Take it one day at a time.”
- “I/We believe in you.”
- “I am/We are here for you.”
- “You can do this.”
Here are some additional, tried-and-true encouraging words for someone in rehab.
“I am/We are really proud of you.”
This is an incredibly supportive statement for someone in rehab to hear. Often, someone dealing with a drug or alcohol addiction has heard comments about their past failures or how disappointing their behavior was.
Telling your loved one you are proud of them offers encouragement and acknowledges that you know the brave decision to enter treatment isn’t always an easy one. It shows that their decision to get help and get sober was a smart choice and that someone is recognizing the good choices they are making.
“You are not alone—I am here for you.”
It takes a lot of courage for someone to acknowledge they have an addiction and want to seek help for it. Depending on the type of rehab your loved one enters, most aspects of their everyday life will change, and that can be scary.
Most of us get uncomfortable when walking into an unknown situation, and the same is true for someone entering a rehab program. Even though your contact may be limited, especially for the first few weeks of the program, it can help your loved one to know you are there for them.
It isn’t uncommon for some people in treatment to feel estranged from their friends or family (possibly because of events or behaviors related to the addiction). Knowing someone is there for them can be a powerful boost during this time.
“Use this time to focus on your recovery.”
If you are wondering what to say to your loved one in rehab, remind them to use this precious time wisely and focus on recovery. Though addiction can be associated with very selfish behaviors, some people will have a hard time focusing on themselves.
For instance, if a parent has decided to go into inpatient rehab, he or she might fixate on the fact that they are away from their children. Or someone might be worried about what they’re missing at work. These thoughts can be distracting and steer focus away from recovery.
Rehab provides an excellent opportunity for your loved one to grow, become more self–aware, and mature into a better version of themselves – all things that will help them continue their recovery journey.
“What can I do to support you during this time?”
You might be wondering what you can do to help someone who is in rehab, and the best way to find out is to ask!
Sometimes, a friend or loved one may have very specific requests, such as can you hold onto their mail, take care of a pet, water their plants, or let them keep their car at your house. Other times, they may not have a direct answer, and that is okay.
Just let them know you are able and willing to help – they just have to say the word. Knowing they have someone who cares will build their confidence and may be all the support they need right now.
The Three Words Your Loved One In Rehab NEEDS To Hear: “I love you”
This simple three-word phrase can offer immense comfort while in drug treatment, as it is a reminder to them that they are not alone on their recovery journey. Emotional strength reinforces hope when they need it most, and expressing unconditional love is just what they need to hear.
Inspiring Quotes About Getting and Staying Sober
Here are some proud sober quotes you can share with a loved one in rehab.
“Believe you can, and you’re halfway there. Sobriety is possible.” – Theodore Roosevelt
“You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream. Recovery opens up endless possibilities.” — C.S. Lewis
“The only way to great work is to love what you do. Stay sober, and find passion.” – Steve Jobs
“Remember, just because you hit rock bottom doesn’t mean you have to stay there.” – Robert Downey Jr.
“If you can quit for a day, you can quit for a lifetime.” – Benjamin Alire Saenz
“Somebody once asked me how I define sobriety, and my response was ‘liberation from dependence.’” — Leslie Jamison
“Sobriety is a journey, not a destination.” – Proverb
“There’s not a drug on Earth that can make life meaningful.” – Sarah Kane
What NOT to Say to Someone in Rehab
Wondering what not to say to someone in rehab? We asked 250 recovering addicts about the worst things a loved one could say to crush their confidence.
Surprisingly, many respondents said “nothing,” as in just what it says – they said nothing at all.
Avoiding communication with your loved one in rehab is one of the least helpful things you can do. So, even though it may feel uncomfortable, it is always advised to reach out to your loved ones in addiction treatment for reassurance and encouragement.
Now, there are certain topics, phrases, and empty statements to avoid when talking to someone in rehab, like:
- “When will you be cured?” – This phrase can put unnecessary pressure, lingering guilt, and feelings of inadequacy on your loved one. Remember, there is no cure for addiction, and recovery is a lifelong process. Instead, reassure them they have your support, today and for years to come.
- “Why did you end up in rehab?” – This question is invasive and judgmental and may not be any of your business. Besides, the reasons why someone is in rehab are less important than the fact that they are taking steps to improve their life and future goals of sobriety. Instead, reassure them that you are there to provide support when they need someone to listen or talk to. Support encourages the healing process and makes all the difference during addiction treatment.
- “Why can’t you just quit? It’s not that hard.” – Recovery is a complex and challenging process. And your loved one has probably tried to quit before but was not successful. Minimizing the difficulty of recovery or reminding them of their failed attempts is dismissive and unsupportive. Instead, acknowledge their efforts and express confidence in their ability to succeed and their bright future ahead.
- “You’re lucky you’re getting a break/vacation.” – Rehab is NOT a break from the outside world, and it is NOT a vacation. Rehab is hard work—some of the hardest work that you will ever do. Implying that they are not working when starting their recovery journey, that they are getting a break, or that their decision to get sober shouldn’t be their top priority may undermine their commitment to the rehab process. Instead, tell them you are proud of their commitment and hard work.
- “Are you sure that you need to be in rehab?” Questioning the necessity of rehab may undermine your loved one’s ability to refrain from substance abuse and their commitment to recovery. This is especially damaging to individuals who were pressured or forced to attend rehab. Instead, offer positive reinforcement of their decision.
Here are five topics to avoid when speaking with someone in treatment, as they can make it harder for them to feel connected to friends and family:
- Stories about past drug or alcohol use can remind them of negative emotions or trigger urges they are trying to deal with in recovery.
- Judgment or criticism can hurt their self-esteem and interfere with the healing process during treatment.
- Talking about future expectations may overwhelm them with pressure when they’re still focusing on day-to-day progress.
- Comments about weight or appearance can cause emotional distress and distract from inner growth.
- Unsolicited advice may feel intrusive—it’s more helpful to listen and ask how you can aid in their recovery.
Supporting Recovery:
Actions That Reinforce Your Effort and Offer Support
While words matter, actions speak volumes. Show your support through thoughtful gestures that reinforce your encouragement, can remind them of your love, and accelerate the healing process:
Attend Family Therapy or Addiction Treatment Support Groups
Participating in family therapy sessions and addiction support groups can help you better understand the recovery process and strengthen your relationship.
It demonstrates your commitment to being a part of their recovery journey.
Send Care Packages or Thoughtful Gifts
A rehab care package might include items like inspirational books, journals for reflection, or comforting personal items.
Gifts such as recovery medallions or personalized notes can serve as daily reminders of your love and support.
- *Family members are always encouraged to contact the addiction treatment center prior to send packages to ensure they adhere to all program guidelines.
Celebrate Milestones And Future Goals
Acknowledge achievements, whether it’s completing a week of rehab or achieving a major recovery milestone.
Celebrations don’t need to be extravagant—small tokens of appreciation or heartfelt notes work wonders.
Understanding Rehab Rules
Every rehab facility operates under specific guidelines to protect the recovery environment. These may include restrictions on phone calls, visits, or personal belongings.
To support your loved one effectively:
- Familiarize yourself with the facility’s rules.
- Respect communication boundaries, such as limited phone time (can you make phone calls in rehab?).
- Follow the visitation schedule and adhere to their policies to avoid disrupting their progress.
By aligning your actions with the facility’s framework, you provide consistent support while respecting their recovery structure.
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Substance Use Support When You Hit Rock Bottom
Knowing what to say to someone in rehab is crucial, as our words hold power, and you do not want to cause someone to stumble or feel defeated. Just remember that your friend or loved one is going through a lot of changes, and your encouragement and patience can be very motivating for them to succeed.
If your loved one is struggling with an untreated substance use disorder and isn’t currently in rehab, one of the most impactful steps you can take is to encourage them to seek professional treatment. Options like a Luxury Rehab in Los Angeles can provide the comprehensive care they need in a supportive, high-end environment.
Legacy Healing Center is committed to helping individuals achieve lasting sobriety and reclaim a fulfilling life.
Addiction impacts the mind, body, and soul, which is why we take a holistic approach to treatment. Our comprehensive care includes appropriate psychotropic medications, advanced clinical therapy, group and family therapy, as well as personalized aftercare planning. Whether you’re considering outpatient rehab programs or an inpatient residential program, our team is here to help. Contact us or call 888-534-2295 anytime to learn more.
FAQs About What to Say to Someone in Rehab
How can I show my support without being intrusive or making unrealistic promises?
Knowing how to support someone in rehab can be difficult if you are unprepared. Here are nine things you can do for someone in rehab without being intrusive or making unrealistic promises:
- Practice active listening without pressuring them to share information.
- Respect their privacy by not asking intrusive questions about rehab or the reasons behind their stay.
- Send positive and uplifting messages to let them know you believe in them.
- Offer practical assistance, such as driving them to treatment or looking after their home while they’re away.
- Educate yourself about addiction and recovery to better understand their journey.
- Respect their boundaries and let them share only when and what they want.
- Attend alumni events that are organized by the rehab facility.
- Avoid enabling behaviors, and only provide healthy, beneficial support.
- Celebrate milestones, even seemingly small ones.
What are some things I should avoid saying that might discourage someone in rehab?
Here are some things that might discourage someone in rehab if you say them:
- “Just snap out of it.”
- “It’s not that hard.”
- “What’s wrong with you?”
- “You let everyone/anyone/me down.”
- “Why can’t you just control yourself/your substance use?
- “I don’t think you can do it.”
- “You’re never going to change.”
- “Have you actually learned your lesson?”
- “I thought you were better/stronger than this.”
- “There’s no point.”
- “You’re not strong/committed/good enough.”
- “You’re just going to relapse (again)”
- “I told you so.”
- “This is your fault.”
- “You deserve this.”
Is it okay to talk about a person’s addiction with them?
In many circumstances, it is appropriate to talk about a person’s addiction with them. However, there are times when it is not appropriate, and doing so always requires sensitivity and consideration.
Here are some helpful guidelines to keep in mind when talking to someone about their addiction.
- Choose the right setting, ideally a private and comfortable one.
- Ask for permission before initiating the conversation.
- Make it clear that they can share as much or as little as they feel comfortable with.
- Use non-judgmental, empathetic language.
- Choose an appropriate time, not during moments of stress or tension.
- Listen more than you speak.
- Express concern where necessary, but always avoid criticism.
- Educate yourself beforehand so that you can approach the topic with sensitivity.
- Avoid making any assumptions.
- Offer healthy and appropriate supportive words.
- Avoid being an enabler or minimizing the seriousness of any issues.
- Respect their privacy and do not pry further if they are uncomfortable sharing.
- Be patient and understanding, and wait for them to open up on their own.